Although my last post was filled with odd, and intriguing quirks into Basotho Culture, it has to be said that this culture produces some of the nicest, most generous, caring and sharing kind of people. This is something I have indeed adopted myself. It is a simple symbiosis, innately prevalent, allowing us to live and work peacefully together.
Incidentally, I believe the culture of America to be quite different than that of Basotho. Basotho are as perfect as you can get to a truly altruistic society. In the States we believe we are altruistic, but generally when good is done to us we often feel as though we owe something back, or if we do good to someone more often than not we crave something in return or recognition.
The following examples depict my American opinions on favor-exchange and how Basotho generally don't expect anything in return in certain relationships I have created.
‘Meighbor
My ‘meighbor (= ‘M’e + neighbor) is always bringing me bread, motoho (porridge), beans, and anything she cooks quite regularly. She does it purely altruistically, to make sure I am fed and happy. Because she offers me goods, I feel obligated to return the favor. Therefore I bring her any cool desserts I make, or cheesy American foods she hasn’t tried. It's an amazing symbiotic relationship we have, yet while she expects nothing, I would feel guilty not offering back.
When I am running late from town, or it rains my ‘meighbor always takes care of my solar equipment without even asking. She is always looking out for me. Truly another mother. The only thing she ask for is for me to charge her cell phone, which I never deny.
It is important to realize that being a “white” volunteer in a developing country has some innate rules. Doing an occasional favor can often lead to incessant pestering. Volunteers nowadays find our job more difficult, because missionaries and people of the developed world in the past used to give out so much, that people just expect everything from us.
The relationship I have built with my 'meighbor is a unique exception, where we both help the other out while her culture doesn't expect anything in return and mine can.
Bana (little children)
On hot days I often run out of water, or it’s too hot to run to the store and buy eggs. Children are always flocking around me (I would too if I were them). I think its because they are bored, and because I am funny looking for them. So I employ them by giving them money to buy my various goods or to fetch my water from a different tap. Then I pay them with limpompong (candy), although they don't expect it. They basically go on little adventures and it is a win-win situation. As mentioned above, it is important to be generous in specific situations such as this. If you just give candy willy-nilly kids multiply like e-coli.
The Stray Dog named Chompy
Because I gave him my edible cat, he now protects me. People here think it is really odd that a dog just chills with me.
Students
My students usually do their homework, and why is that? Because I promise not to take away their shoes, or make them sit on the floor if they do my work. Maybe this relationship is a bit more parasitic....
Randoms
This may be odd in American culture, but here as soon as you make conversation you are friends. People will get your phone number and just call to talk, they will remember you and pick you up on the street when you are traveling, and ask you very personal questions. The other day some random guy (my friend now) sat next to me on the taxi, took my ear phone, and commented to his friend (not my friend because we didn’t talk at that moment) and asked, “Take a picture with me and my American friend listening to American music.” Well I am his friend right? So I told his friend (not my friend, remember I hadn’t talked to his friend yet) to take my camera and take a photo. I taught her how to do it (now we became friends) and we captured the moment, along with several other blurry moments in a dark taxi. Symbiosis? I say yes because it was entertainment for us all. Just goes to show fun, enjoyable company is only one blunt, ballsy, and odd moment away.
